February 2012
24 posts
budweiser is using "runaway"
to market a special “platinum” beer. i am cracking up here.
also, housesitting at the beach house and watching SO MUCH TV. cupcake wars! project runway all-stars! chopped! yesssssss.
so
that is so nice! and weird! i thought you had to have protracted legal battles and stuff for that kind of thing to happen.
so what are you going to do with your $2000?
(i googled “something that costs $2000” and found this. huh! but seriously, that would be a waste of money.)
garble:
i got these stitches right? i got hit by that car door whatever?
the driver contacted his...
i am quite sure you will find this hilarious →
it’s by the guy who does dinosaur comics and it is so funny.
craigslist
cookie swap!
what are you craigslisting booboo?
garble:
craigslist!
i CAN NOT WAIT
to have my children look at my high school yearbook and be like “WHAAAAAT”. it is so gorgeously cheesy. my photo is so bad. like, my hair is blow-dried and i’m looking over my shoulder. YES.
oh man
i adore you and your biology jokes.
garble:
today was exhausting.
I totally rewrote that application letter by the way. Thank you so much for your help. It was really quite off base, huh? I did it in CRUNCH TIME, in the two hours between work and class (in which I also wrote a two-page response about lady abuse and compiled and printed all my application stuff, packaged it, and sent it off...
so this article isn't that great or anything →
but i chortled because the older daughter is “em” and the younger daughter is “el” which is like us except neither of us has tourette’s, knock wood.
this is almost too obvious of a response but it needs to be made because you ball hard.
garble:
I got accepted into my major! Stress about grades: over forever! (kind of)
Which is GOOD because I got a 76/100 on my LS2 midterm. Do you know how the curving of grades works? The median was 70, so I scored above that, but in the general clump of “middle.” Is that clump the C’s or the B’s?
In...
garb(le): tomorrow for dinner →
you don’t need to break any bones or anything before roasting it. when you’re serving it, you can (if you’re not exceedingly hungry) cut through the joint between the thigh and the leg.
this is a video that demonstrates that process with a turkey. basically the same concept. (except for when they do that mango/kale decorating shit. what is that?)
also i’m so glad it was...
internship applying
YES! who knew you were so awesome? answer: me. and now them. yay! are they all in LA?
garble:
GOING GREAT!!
(I have had TWO positive replies and offers to set up meetings! Who knew people were so nice?)
sometimes i think the internet just makes this... →
just KEEPING UP THE GOOD FUCKING WORK. np.
garble:
i got a brain boner just from the phrase alone. RACISM!
wearesistersandfriends:
oh you know no big deal just MAINTAINING THE MISSION OF DR KING WHATEVS.
garble:
to punk me.
like, seriously?
tomorrow for dinner
oh man how was it? i am excited about your dinner evenings in advance too. roast chicken is one of the most satisfying of dinners to make. IN THE LAND.
garble:
roast chicken and asparagus!
(is it cool that i’m excited about dinner evenings in advance?)
sometimes i think the internet just makes this... →
oh you know no big deal just MAINTAINING THE MISSION OF DR KING WHATEVS.
garble:
to punk me.
like, seriously?
can you still ask apple for one?
you: “thx boo!”
garble:
god i need a printer
mass texting the internet
YEA you are a g. just make sure to punctuate appropriately when you ask them if they are dtf.
(let me know if you want me to look over anything)
garble:
i’m doing it.
(writing professors about educational research internships this summer. wahoodles)
whoops
OBVI. also today i was in the student lounge after hours and no one else was there and i…kind of ate some tortilla chips out of a bag that was in the garbage can. i mean, it was on top of all the garbage! and i had just seen it deposited in the lounge that afternoon! and they were still in the bag! but still: garbage chips what is wrong with me.
garble:
AHAHAHA
did you eat it?
...
hahaha you are here
in san francisco!
i’m like:
suspicions
i think that hard-to-read guy lost interest since we banged (oh yeah ps we banged). i’m not sad about it but i’m a little sad about it. more the general phenomenon than the dude himself. this keeps happening.
i almost wrote something terrible and self-pitying but i’ve restrained myself.
whoops
just accidentally put curry powder in my oatmeal.
i'm eating fried rice
yeaaaaah buddy! what did you put in it?
garble:
it’s gooey and warm and greasy.
just thought i’d let you know.
this could have been us →
only recently. remember, we also conquered and colonized most of the orient.
garble:
oh god our genes are so embarrassing
wearesistersandfriends:
“I couldn’t give a damn though, I’ve near enough got my a**e out tonight.”
January 2012
53 posts
this could have been us →
“I couldn’t give a damn though, I’ve near enough got my a**e out tonight.”
some enjoyable stuff here →
ohhh my god i laughed so hard at this picture that i farted. TRUE STORY LIFE IMITATES ART.
garble:
by the same artist:
wearesistersandfriends:
also, i think my personal style needs to include more shawl-collar sweaters.
olivia's bat mitzvah photos
by and large some of the most questionable photos ever taken of our family. my god.
some enjoyable stuff here →
also, i think my personal style needs to include more shawl-collar sweaters.
your next sur la table snack →
pot rack!
YES! you are the number one suzy diy homemaker. i love that it is purple.
garble:
i made it!
"ask a lady" just made me laugh out loud in the... →
this one isn’t even that good, but this line just cracked me up:
“Brains make thoughts like butts make poops, and none of it necessarily means anything.”
also today in small group i nearly lost it when someone asked a question about a baby’s stooling pattern and our instructor said “ah yes, poops.”
oh dude i forgot to tell you
i wore the boots. on a date! with that boy that i couldn’t tell if he liked me or not! i credit them with a) giving me the courage to just straight-up ask him “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF OR NOT?”, b) him saying yes, and c) our ensuing public makeouts in the woefully well-lit alcove of the well’s fargo on the corner of 22nd and mission. granted, rum probably deserves to be...
i love the hairpin →
how do they find all of these ladies who live my life but with more drinking?
tee hee hee →
they are friends!
meringues
yeah! if you like them, i recommend you make a pavlova.
garble:
am i right?
whoooo's that girl, farting in the gym?
it is me.
oh man i love this and yet it also makes me want... →
today i called 911 twice!
you’re a hero!
garble:
before 10 AM!!
(I’m a hero?)
(la is just crazy.)
this →
ohhhh my god this looks adorable. i love that they are not trying to be fancy about things and are instead going STRAIGHT FOR THE CRAZY. you could imagine that it really could be so culty and precious, but they’re just like LOOK AT THESE MEXICAN WRESTLERS DO YOU WANT A TACO HOMES?
let’s go to there.
garble:
WAS SO GOOD
(and so hilarious)
one sign inside read:
“TUESDAY SPECIAL
...
i want to eat this →
this whole website is adorable. do you like…bitter things?
i'm not great at having houseguests
i get real tired.
a mandate for ladies
all leg-shaving should be accompanied with a rockin’ eighties soundtrack. the experience is improved IMMEASURABLY.
started watching my anthro lecture
um i am not sure if i understand the irony. ellen you have ascended to some next-level social science humor.
garble:
ended watching videos of different artists singing Sweet Low, Swing Chariot
the irony is not lost on me
a real question from my anthro homework (or, why i...
hahahahahah i hope they made this joke on purpose.
garble:
On insect camouflage:
“The late paleontologist Stephen Jay Gould argued that although selection could perfect mimicry once it evolve, it could not cause resemblance to arise in the first place. ’Can there be any edge,’ Gould asked, ‘to looking 5% like a turd?’ Can you think of a reason why looking 5% like a turd would be better than...
what do i do with really shitty raisin bran?
OH MY GOD this is straight-up genius. so good. so gross. GROOOOODDDSSS.
garble:
or THIS!
(heads up: kraftfoods.com has competition)
wearesistersandfriends:
the homosexual bloc recommends: muffins. marshmallow krispie-type treats was briefly considered and then dropped.
garble:
this raisin bran is shit.