[video]
i hope beyonce and jay-z never break up. i actually worry about this a lot.
we are sisters (and friends!): saga -
i kept up the facade in my response but also told him i didn’t want to date. him: “yeah sorry it didn’t work out. i was really excited to meet you.” am i supposed to feel…guilty?
HAHAHAHAH! that poor guy. why would you even ask? would you really want to know?
so i went on a date with this dental student i met on the internet who i thought might be nice EVEN THOUGH he sent me a link in our initial communications to zoe deschanel’s lifestyle blog. i mean what the fuck. anyway, so we went on this date and 20 minutes in i was DONE. i mean DONE DONE DONE…
and i think you’ll like it
boil a pot of water. while this is happening, cut up 3 zucchini into half-moons and mince 4 cloves of garlic. when the water boils, put in half a package of linguine or whatever. heat up a goodly glorp of olive oil in your frying pan and fry up that zucchini with quite a bit of salt and pepper until it is tender. put in the garlic and some red pepper flakes and toss around until fragrant. NOW! smoosh the zucchini/garlic/pepper flakes to the side and crack two eggs in the empty space. let them fry undisturbed. reserve some pasta water and drain your pasta. put the pasta in a bowl, and then scrape all that zucchini/egg/garlic business on top of it. put the frying pan back on the stove and pour a little of your pasta water into it. scrape the pan to get all the shit off, and then pour all of that into the pasta bowl too. toss and eat.
so i went on a date with this dental student i met on the internet who i thought might be nice EVEN THOUGH he sent me a link in our initial communications to zoe deschanel’s lifestyle blog. i mean what the fuck. anyway, so we went on this date and 20 minutes in i was DONE. i mean DONE DONE DONE BORED SO DONE.
so, when he went to the bathroom, i texted mat and was like “I DO NOT WANT TO BE ON THIS DATE ANY MORE. please call me in 5 minutes and be in a crisis.”
and when he called 5 minutes later i picked up and was like “oh nooo i’m so sorry this is so rude but my friend is in a crisis I GOTTA GO” and before he could really realize what i was doing i ran the fuck out of there at top speed and went to have drinks with mat and jeff at a bar that has free popcorn.
BUT THEN: the next day i got a text from the guy saying “is your friend okay, or were you just using it as an excuse to leave?”
fucking YUM i love bread pudding. it is a great special brunch food to make for your friends. also did you see that the person who wrote the recipe is named ellen? yay.
i like bread pudding. there is a joke in here about our heritage as starving english peasants, but i can’t find it. good morning!
was this good or mushy or good-mushy? did you serve it with anything besides spoons?
awwwwwww yeah
(file under: i’m so happy my friends are people who will eat these things)
oh damn girl i love that. you could put coconut in it. also: make a tumblr of these great ideas, get famous. for oatmeal.
(bananas, pecans, nutmeg, maple syrup)
is there an archive of Great Oatmeal Combination Ideas somewhere? I want to try them all.
garb(le): here is an email I received from grandma -
hahaaaa so good. facebook stalking already accomplished and my assessment is that he is an awkward nerd.
evidence:
edit: oh my god do you know who else is an awkward nerd? here is a little where’s waldo for you:
maybe they should date.
busy busy busy but will be back to it soon i hope.